PRESIDENT JACOB ZUMA – ROCK STAR

The president of South Africa’s personal life has been in the spotlight for many years and as many reasons. From rape trials and polygamy practices to fathering a child out of wedlock, it reads like a soapie. The latest involves American-Sudanese model-cum-hostess/novelist and actress Kola Boof, who is best known for her affair with Osama bin Laden or “Somi”, as she apparently affectionately called him. In what turned into a Twitter circus, Boof (who is on the suspected terrorist list in the USA) alleged Jacob Zuma complimented her “huge natural breasts” and asked her to “name her price” for a weekend sex tryst in South Africa under the guise of wanting to talk about Osama bin Laden. The South African Twitter audience took serious offence at these allegations, to which she replied, “I don’t know why South Africans are angry with me for telling the truth. What I don’t get is that they know their president.” The president hasn’t commented, but last we heard presidential spokesperson Mac Maharaj was on clean-up duty.

MORGAN TSVANGIRAI – FATHERING A NATION (LITERALLY)

Recently widowed 59-year-old Zimbabwean prime minister Morgan Tsvangirai is known for his fight for democracy for the people of the tormented country. 2011 brought about a different kind of struggle for Tsvangirai as it surfaced that his newfound freedom had unleashed his inner playboy and left in its wake a string of broken hearts. Included in this devastation was 23-year-old Loretta Nyathi, by whom he allegedly fathered a child and who then sued him for child maintenance earlier this year. Immediately after emerged commodity broker Lorcadia Karimatsenga, who is currently pregnant with twins after an affair with Tsvangirai that spanned several years. Many attempts by Karimatsenga to tie down the elusive prime minister failed until he was nudged into “doing the right thing” by his peers (read PR team). In a move that outdid Kim Kardashian, Tsvangirai ended the marriage a mere 12 days after tying the knot. This behaviour drew sharp criticism from Zimbabwean president Robert Mugabe, who urged the prime minister to get his house in order and exercise some responsibility. Lack of discretion could spell an unfortunate end for a man who has dedicated his life to a dream of democracy but struggles to keep his pants on.

FIKILE MBALULA – PLAYING AWAY FROM HOME

Known for his “razzmatazz” and lavish celebrations with C-list American celebrities, South African sports minister Fikile Mbalula made headlines in 2011 when it emerged that though he preached a message of safe sex he himself had had an extra-marital affair with a Johannesburg model, Joyce Molamu, which had allegedly resulted in pregnancy. The story didn’t end there – Molamu tried to extort money from Mbalula by asking for money to have an abortion. The initial R10 000 was paid, but she later demanded R40 000, threatening to go public should the amount not be paid.

FORMER ISRAELI PRESIDENT MOSHE KATSAV – TAKING PRESIDENTIAL PERKS TOO FAR

Former Israeli president Moshe Katsav began serving his seven-year sentence in December last year after the Israel Supreme Court found him guilty of raping a former employee while he was a Cabinet minister and of sexually harassing two other women during his term as president from 2000 to 2007.

DOMINIC STRAUSS KHAN – “DID HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH THAT WOMAN”

The thrice-married father-of-four got caught up in a shambolic sex scandal case after a maid at the Sofitel New York Hotel, Nafissatou Diallo, accused him of sexual assault. After a lot of wasted time and money the charges were dropped as the witness was found to lack credibility. It later emerged that DSK, as he’s known, did “have sexual relations with that woman”, but while it was a moral fault, it did not involve any violence or aggression.

NDUMISO MAMBA – COURT JESTER

In 2010 Ndumiso Mamba, the justice minister and childhood friend of King Mswati of Swaziland, was caught with his hand in the proverbial royal cookie jar. Mamba and the king’s 12th wife (yes, 12th!) – Nothando Dube, who was 22 at the time – would meet regularly at the Royal Villas in Ezulwini and find comfort from royal and government duties in each other’s arms. The agents for the king cottoned on to the shenanigans, followed the couple to the posh venue and accosted them. In a desperate and rather pathetic attempt to hide, Mamba slit the base of the bed and hid inside, but the police dragged him out and arrested him. The naughty queen was grounded and kept under house arrest at the queen mother’s residence.

ANTHONY WEINER – IT’S ALL IN THE NAME!

Former US congressman Anthony Wiener became an example of how the internet is not your friend when he sent a sexually suggestive picture of his underwear-clad erection to a woman who had been following him on Twitter. At first he denied all, claiming that his account had been hacked but later admitted to his indiscretions, adding that he had been sending sexually explicit messages and pictures to nine other women and subsequently resigned.